Wednesday, February 1, 2017

Run Fast

I asked him over, since my parents were gone 
And I didn’t want to be alone.  “Neither 
Do I,” he said over the phone, “Neither do 
I.”  He came through the door all out of breath, like 
He’d run fast and far from something.  It was fine, 
At first.  He just wanted to see the house, take
A look around, maybe watch some TV, “Have
A little fun.”  I wasn’t sure what he meant
“Have a little fun,” but I smiled anyway,
Thought, yeah, maybe a little.  It’d be alright.

When I showed him my room he plopped down on my 
Bed, bounced around a bit, told me “Come here,” but 
I stood still, didn’t want to stay there, but he 
Said “relax” and I did.  Sitting next to him
It seemed ok.  He was so nice the way he 
Touched my face, held me close, whispered, then kissed me.   

We pulled at each other’s clothes, laid very close,
Feeling all out of control, pounding in my 
Chest.  I said maybe we should slow down, maybe 
We should stop.  We should stop.  And I fought, pleaded 
I wasn’t ready, told him I didn't want 
To, that I was scared, now of him, pushing me 
Down until I couldn't move.  I said no.  I 
Said it again, begging against pink polka 
Dot sheets.  I wanted my mother to find us—
Now!—no matter how mad, anything than this.  

I tried to forget where I was, what I was,
My family’s eyes, their portrait, looking, still. 
When the phone rang he stopped—I pushed him off.  I 
Said hello, voice running past, the other, small, 
From earth’s end, mom asking what I was up to.

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